Party Recovery


Originally published on October 31st, 2016.
Photo is public domain. Article is Property of

Note: This article was meant to satirize douchey frat bros but I also got to nerd out and base it around my favorite Aquabats song. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it, even though I had to cut some stuff back for the sake of professionalism. Thank you to Dirty and Thirty for being lenient with my silly writing here.

“The ratio of girls to guys is five to one, there hasn’t been a party like this since 1981”. The Aquabats wrote those legendary lyrics in 2000, but maybe you’re experiencing them in 2016. Maybe you DID just have the greatest party ever. Maybe (and from now on I’m assuming) there was a pool, hamburgers, lots of drinks, and a bunch of things you can’t talk about. However, that was last night, and today you have to clean up. Don’t worry though, I’ve made you a schedule.

Read the rest here!


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